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What is a meeting?
A "meeting of the minds" is a dinner party held to introduce the prospective couple to their parents and families and to deepen the friendship between the two families. It is an important first step toward marriage and an opportunity to get to know each other's families in a relaxed atmosphere.
Difference from Knotting
A yuninoh is a traditional marriage ceremony that has been held since ancient times, in which the two families formally exchange betrothal gifts and exchange of betrothal gifts. It is a more prestigious occasion, with the preparation of betrothal gifts and customs.
On the other hand, the face to face meeting is less formal and is usually held over a meal and socializing. Recently, many couples have opted for a face to face meeting in lieu of a betrothal gift, and the ease and simplicity of preparation is appealing.
When to hold a meeting? How to decide the date and timing
The meeting (both families' meeting dinner) is generally held after the wedding greetings are completed.Within 3 monthsMany couples set the date about 6 months before the wedding. For those who are concerned about the six days of the week, such as "Oyasu" and "Tomohiki," it would be safer to check the morning and auspicious days of the week. By confirming the availability of both families early and allowing plenty of time for scheduling, preparations such as reservations and outfit preparation will go smoothly.
Preparation until the day of the meeting
Determination of dates
Coordinate the availability of both families and set the date as early as possible. It is best to set a date that allows plenty of time for the wedding.
Venue Selection
Ideally, a private room in a ryotei (Japanese-style restaurant) or a restaurant is an ideal space for a relaxed conversation. Choosing a place where you can enjoy a meal in a friendly atmosphere will deepen the friendship between the two families.
Confirmation of cost sharing
In most cases, the groom's side is expected to bear the burden, but recently it is also common for the bride and groom to bear the burden. Both families should discuss this in advance and clarify how the burden will be borne.
What to wear on the day
We recommend that men wear suits and women wear more formal attire, such as one-piece dresses or visiting kimonos. It is important to match the formalities of both families, so it is recommended to discuss this in advance.
Preparing Souvenirs
Choose a local confectionery or good-luck gift, with a standard gift amount of 3,000 to 5,000 yen. Avoid excessively expensive items; it is best to show your appreciation for the gift.
Progress on the day of the event
To ensure that the toasts, self-introductions, and confirmation of marriage intentions proceed smoothly, it is a good idea to decide in advance who will serve as the facilitator.
Tsukiji Jisaku's Face-to-Face Meeting Plan
Tell me all about your meeting!
Both parents live far away, where is the best venue?
If your parents live far away from each other, why not hold the wedding in the place where you will make your new life together? It will give your parents a chance to see and feel the place where you will live.
How should I pay for transportation and lodging for parents coming from far away?
It depends on the situation! There is no rule that says "this one!
The most frequently asked patterns are
(1) Bride and groom are responsible for transportation and dinner party fees, etc.
The parents are responsible for their own accommodation and transportation expenses, and the bride and groom are responsible for the dinner party.
The bride and groom are responsible for all expenses, which will be divided into three parts later.
It would be a good idea to arrange a hotel or some other place to spend a night with each parent, so that the parents and children can spend a night together.
In either case, do not do it out of the blue, but consult with us before making a decision.
Do you still prefer Japanese food? What kind of restaurant should I choose?
Yes, if you are unfamiliar with table manners, Japanese food may make you feel less nervous. While keeping an eye on your preferences and those of your parents, it would be best to avoid sharing large plates, buffet-style meals, casseroles, or dishes such as crab, which are difficult to eat.
While a familiar restaurant is fine, a private room or other place that is partitioned off or less noisy is preferred.
Are there any precautions to be decided before the day of the event?
It is important that you and your parents share the overall level of emphasis on manners and etiquette, as well as the degree of formality of the day's attire.
Although it is customary for the groom's side to sit at the top of the table, many people today consider neither the groom's side nor the bride's side to be the top or bottom of the table. It is a good idea to share the seating arrangements you have made with your parents in advance, rather than rushing around on the day of the wedding.
It is a good idea to share with the parents whether or not there will be any gifts and how much they will cost.